Strain Review: Grease Monkey, By Mendo Dope


Multiple award winner and highly experienced breeder Mike from “Exotic Genetix” has created some of the best strains for connoisseur smokers and patients to enjoy. When we heard about these amazing crosses he was producing we knew we had to get our hands on some of his seeds and give them a try. We were first introduced to Mike through our good friend Cuban Grower who is a well-respected hash maker and grower.

We all kicked it inside the Exotic Genetix booth at a High Times Cannabis Cup smoking Backwoods laced with Cubans full melt hash while chopping game about growing. Looking through his catalog of flavors we came across the “Grease Monkey” and it instantly grabbed our attention. Grease Monkey is a cross between GG4 and Cookies & Cream. We have always enjoyed smoking authentic GG4 but have never grown it ourselves.

Plus we got the chance to smoke some of the Cuban Growers personal stash of “Cookies & Cream” hash and we knew right then the combination of these strains were going to produce some out of this world resin. GG4 is known to have very high THC levels and the flowers are packed with beautiful trichomes. Cookies & Cream as well comes loaded with glistening diamond crystal heads surrounding each flower. With the skunky gas flavor of GG4 and the thick creamy taste from the Cookies & Cream all coming together, this was sure to be one funky monkey.

Grease Monkey is a hard-hitting resin coated cross that you can smell from a mile away when she starts to flower. If you have ever driven by a dead skunk on the road or have unfortunately been sprayed by one, you might be able to imagine the intense aroma this flower produces. This strain is very strong and has an amazing growth pattern from its sharp jagged leaves to the massive stalks that can hold up enormous weight.

When we started our seeds it wasn’t hard for us to pick out our favorite pheno. We always base our decisions mainly on plant structure but we will use the classic stem rub technique as well. Right away our pick of the litter was looking very strong and stalky seeming to be a perfect blend of the GG4 and Cookies & Cream parents.

Starting our seeds on February 10th and planting in a 600g Smart Pot by May 6th we were on track to grow a monster ganja tree. The Grease Monkey was instantly impressing us once we got her planted. After the first topping, we used our inner cage and green tape to spread open the plant and it began to blow up over the next few weeks. It seemed like we were using green tape every other day pulling out more and more branches to form a perfect ball of green.

When flowering began she wasn’t the first one in the garden to produce resin but we could see the bud sights forming and knew it was going to be heavy! After the first few weeks of bloom, we started getting a smell of what was soon to come. The aroma was pure funk and grease. The smooth creamy overtone from the Cookies and Cream was almost intoxicating while squeezing the flower. Right away we wanted to get a closer look at the forming resin so we took out the magnifying lens and zoomed in. As I focused in with the lens, massive mushroom-shaped trichomes appeared in front of my eyes. The shape of the resin glands was perfect, thick stalks with huge round heads at the top filled with gooey THC.

It was amazing watching the flowers produce this healing resin that began turning milky white with hues of amber tones. They seemed to continue producing more and more trichomes every day. At first, this plant was just a baby being thrown into an ocean of soil now it had completely overgrown the 600g Smart Pot filled with Big Roots. Fully supported with inner trellis layers and caging this pant was able to produce thousands of bud sights forming the ultimate canopy. During the season we had been talking with our partner Mr. Bond about collaborating on an entry for the Emerald Cup but we didn’t know what to expect from the Grease Monkey quite yet. After closely examining numerous genetics growing in the garden that year we had our eyes on the Grease resin. Not only were the resin heads and crystal formation looking on point, but the smell was overwhelming. Next time you’re at a machine shop find the dirtiest oil-soaked rag in the building and take a whiff, that’s the smell of the Grease Monkey. For some it can be too much to handle, for others, it is the perfect funky gas they’ve been searching for all along.

The Grease Monkey harvested in about 56-60 days and during the final week flowers thickened and became very dense ending with a perfect sparkling finish. This Grease Monkey maxed out at about 12ft wide and 9ft tall with a perfectly round shape of nothing but bud. To compete with the best of the best we would need to capture this resin live fresh from the plant so the timing would need to be perfect.

We flew out Mr. Bond from Rhode Island and together we carefully harvested the Grease Monkey, freezing it in time. The freshly frozen frosty white buds spinning through the ice cold water was hypnotizing. Mr. Bond said it best, it was “Gold in, gold out”. The 2016 Emerald Cup was the first competition that we had ever entered and we took 3rd place for best full melt water hash. Competing against some of the worlds best hash makers we were able to receive our first Cannabis Cup trophy using the Grease Monkey strain. Every puff rocks your brain like a punch from Nate Diaz.

Both flower and concentrate have an amazing eye appeal and burn just as good as they look. The smoke is thicker then bay area fog and with the funky grease terps screaming off the flowers it takes your breath away and expands your lungs. The flavor is unmistakable. Rich creamy aftertaste from the Cookies & Cream lingers on the taste buds while the GG4 instantly coats the tongue with a layer of fuel. Gas, oil, and grease all come together packing a loud punch to the nostrils. Grease Monkey is great for outdoor growing. This strain has strong genetics that enables it to produce massive buds and fight off mold and mildew without a problem. On our test run of the Grease Monkey indoors, she grew fast and was easily trainable. In bloom, it was completely covered in trichomes with a beautiful silver/white color.

These flowers were oozing in resin. Numerous people who had the chance to try our homegrown flowers told us it was the best weed they had ever smoked. Harvesting this strain is very easy, each branch is packed with clusters of colas and the bud to leaf ratio is outstanding. Easy to train and loves being topped, the Grease Monkey forms an amazing canopy and produces some of the best-looking flowers.

With the high testing THC levels this is sure to knock you down for the count. Great for relieving pain and I would definitely recommend it for insomnia patients as well. This is that end of the day smoke that will put you to sleep and relax your entire body. From its structure, weight, smell, looks, all the way down to its extreme flavor, for us, the Grease Monkey is an all-around winner. Visit our website and check out the “How To Grow” DVD featuring the Grease Monkey in an outdoor grow.

Breeder: Exotic Genetix
Genetics: GG4 x Cookies & Cream
Yield: Heavy
Harvest: 56-63 Days
Indica 50% Sativa 50%

Written and Published By Grease Monkey In Weed World Magazine Issue 135


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